The thirteenth week of Spring 2008 saw one team climb in the standings, while one team slipped. Angela Bradford landed this week's high game for the women with a 182, and women's high series was bagged by Jennifer Seefeldt with a 486. As for the men, Don Glasscock earned this week's high game (237) and series (657). Read on for all the rest of the details!
First up, on lanes 19 & 20: Bad Newz Kennels spent a romantic evening with Dr. Strangelanes, Or How I Learned To Stop Opening And Earn The Belt. Highlighting the skills of Phil Schroeder with his astounding 580 series, the Kennels collected 3 wins against Dr. Strangelanes. Conversely, Seth Gunderson took the lead in Dr. Strangelanes with his 514 despite his team notching only a single win. Bad Newz Kennels remains in 1st place, while Dr. Strangelanes remain in 5th.
On lanes 21 & 22: Split Happens did battle with 3 Dudes and a Doll. Despite being led by James Long with his below-average 493 series, Split Happens got swept by 3 Dudes and a Doll. On the adjacent lane, Chris Rigdon called the shots for 3 Dudes and a Doll with his above-average 550 as they swept the competition. Split Happens remains in 10th place, while 3 Dudes and a Doll remains in 3rd.
On lanes 23 & 24: It's Britney, Bitch faced off against Dios Mios. Despite the strength of Dave Winger with his below-average 374 series, with kudos to Most Valuable Bowler Sabrina Gray, Britney managed only 1.5 wins against Dios Mios. On the flipside, Bill Krejci mastered Dios Mios with his above-average 558 as his team took the series with 2.5 wins. It's Britney, Bitch remains in 9th place, while Dios Mios move 1 spot to 6th.
On lanes 25 & 26: Ebowla had a delightful time with ?. In spite of top-billing by Travis Kleiner with his 450 series, Ebowla accomplished only 1 win against ?. Concurrently, #1 Power Ranked and #1 Head-to-Head Rob Kaszuba shined in ? with his exceptional 523 as his team took the series with 3 wins. Ebowla remains in 8th place, while ? remains in 4th.
Finally, down on lanes 27 & 28: Sofa King Good alternated between bowling and dry humping You Don't Know Sh!t. Notwithstanding the leadership of Don Glasscock with his 657 series, Sofa King accomplished only 1 win against Don't Know Sh!t. As for the opposition, Duncan Ferber guided Don't Know Sh!t with his 589 as his team took the series with 3 wins. Sofa King Good drops 1 spot in the standings to 7th place, while Don't Know Sh!t remains in 2nd.
Bowlers bribing their way into The 200 Club include: Bill Krejci (203), Chris Rigdon (220), Cory Chorpenning (212,202), Don Glasscock (212,208,237), Duncan Ferber (205), John Coleman (223), and Phil Schroeder (222)
In this week's Tournament of Champions brackets: Don Glasscock decimated Division 1, while Phil Schroeder dominated Division 2. Jennifer Seefeldt triumphed over her enemies in Division 3, and Rob Kaszuba spanked Division 4. And, finally, nobody claimed victory in the Interdivisional bracket (though Jeff Unseld (Division ) came closest). In terms of overall points: Don Glasscock reigns over Division 1; Dennis Laube holds the reins in Division 2; Kris Hiestand dominates Division 3; and Shaun Crockett is in the driver's seat in Division 4.
NEXT WEEK:
- First, on lanes 19&20, 2nd-place You Don't Know Sh!t will chill with 9th-place It's Britney, Bitch (hcp 217). Don't Know Sh!t is expected to roll a little low, yet still manage to sweep the series; while Britney is forecast to raise their average even as they endure a rough night.
- Moving to lanes 21&22, 7th-place Sofa King Good will test their mettle against 4th-place ? (hcp 96). Sofa King might maintain their current strength as they just barely miss getting swept; while ? ought to raise their average while they enjoy their victories.
- Then, over on lanes 23&24, 8th-place Ebowla (hcp 68) will meet with 5th-place Dr. Strangelanes, Or How I Learned To Stop Opening And Earn The Belt. Ebowla will likely maintain their current strength as they get swept; while Dr. Strangelanes will probably raise their average while they rack up a sweep.
- Next up, on lanes 25&26, 10th-place Split Happens (hcp 29) will challenge 6th-place Dios Mios. Split Happens might maintain their current strength as they lose the series but avoid getting swept; while Dios Mios ought to hold steady as they enjoy their victories.
- Finally, on lanes 27&28, 3rd-place 3 Dudes and a Doll (hcp 23) will match wits with 1st-place Bad Newz Kennels. 3 Dudes and a Doll is predicted to maintain their current strength as they lose the series but avoid getting swept; while the Kennels are anticipated to raise their average while they enjoy their victories.
*(Remember, the predicted results above are based on mathematical extrapolations and can be changed by all sorts of factors. If you don't like how your team's results are predicted, you and your teammates have the power to prove the math wrong!)
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#1 POWER BOWLER
 Rob Kaszuba Runner Up: Phil Schroeder
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#1 H2H BOWLER
 Rob Kaszuba Runner Up: Phil Schroeder
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FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE)
"Hurry and get it in, I don't know how much longer I can hold this up!"
Jason Garcia, to Ryan Simonet, as they attempted to re-attach a wheel to a bowling bag.
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EXPANDED STANDINGS
Pos. |
Team name |
Record |
Percent |
Total Pins |
Change |
1 |
Bad Newz Kennels |
36-16 |
.692 |
25,178 |
n/a |
2 |
You Don't Know Sh!t |
35-17 |
.673 |
28,759 |
n/a |
3 |
3 Dudes and a Doll |
31-21 |
.596 |
23,932 |
n/a |
4 |
? |
28-24 |
.538 |
21,649 |
n/a |
5 |
Dr. Strangelanes, Or How I Learned To Stop Opening... |
25-27 |
.481 |
24,030 |
n/a |
6 |
Dios Mios |
23.5-28.5 |
.452 |
22,183 |
+1 |
7 |
Sofa King Good |
22-30 |
.423 |
26,530 |
-1 |
8 |
Ebowla |
22-30 |
.423 |
20,734 |
n/a |
9 |
It's Britney, Bitch |
18.5-33.5 |
.356 |
18,476 |
n/a |
10 |
Split Happens |
16-36 |
.308 |
17,273 |
n/a |
Top Individual Achievements for Week 13