We are now halfway through the Fall 2025 season, and the tension is thick enough to slice with a bowling pin. Every frame counts now for those hungry for the championship. Unlike recent seasons, First Place has become a hot potato no one can seem to hold — this week brought our fifth leader change so far, and FanDuel can barely keep can barely keep up with the ever-changing stats. Week eight saw two teams claw their way upward in the standings while two others took a tumble into despair. One bowler rolled a personal best that left jaws on the floor. JoAnne Barber picked up this week’s high game (156) and series (401) for the women, while Nick Kinney dominated with this week’s high game (275) and series (626) for the men. Hold onto your shoes and read on — this league night had drama, heartbreak, and triumph in equal measure!

First up, on lanes 1 & 2: With the scales heavily tipped in one team's favor from the outset, the charming Gutterly Hopeless found themselves in a fateful clash with the merciless No! Not Theo!. JoAnne Barber led Hopeless with her strong 401 series, but even her stellar play couldn’t stave off the storm. As the final pin dropped, Hopeless was swept clean — four games gone like a dream in the gutter. The team sat in silence, disbelief written on every face. “We gave it everything, but the pins gave us nothing,” sighed Chris Lenz afterward. Across the lanes, #1 Power-Ranked and Most Valuable Bowler Nick Kinney blazed through with his 626 series, grinning ear to ear as Not Theo! pulled off a triumphant sweep. “We told ourselves we’re not leaving First Place again,” boasted Kinney. Gutterly Hopeless drop 1 spot in the standings to 5th place, while Not Theo! surges up 1 spot to 1st, the sweet scent of victory filling their bowling bags.

On lanes 3 & 4: FFK squared off against Bowls Deep. With Nathan Burrows absent and substitute bowler Ryan Sisco also stepping in to prove his mettle, rolling with determination that electrified his team. Fueled by Scott Lawson’s above-average 481 series and Cat Atwood’s fiery spirit, FFK struck hard — and struck often — claiming 3 games with sheer precision. “We might be Fluffykins, but tonight we had claws or steel,” laughed Atwood afterward. Their 3-1 victory sends them climbing 1 spot in the standings to 4th place. Meanwhile, Bowls Deep, led by Brian Schaben’s better-than-normal 366 series, battled valiantly but only surfaced for air once with a single win. “We had flashes of brilliance,” Schaben said, “but next week, we’re diving even Deeper.” Still, Deeeeeep remains in 6th place — licking their wounds but vowing a comeback that’ll make waves.

Finally, down on lanes 5 & 6: Squid Row matched wits with Trump's Tariff Turkeys. Folks, let me tell you, nobody’s ever seen bowling like this — tremendous bowling, maybe the best ever. Squid Row was so strong, you’d think the National Guard should’ve been called to keep the peace. Matthew Taylor — great bowler, but his 529 series, folks, it could’ve been better. I’ve seen Melania do better. But with #1 Head-to-Head bowler Scott Thompson leading the charge — very powerful guy, people are saying that — Squid Row rolled 3 big, beautiful wins. They’re so happy, they might sue the state of Illinois just for fun. On the other side, Trump's Tariff Turkeys tried very hard — believe me — with AJ Hofmann putting up a strong 474 series. But even with all the tariffs in the world, they couldn’t protect themselves from the Squid’s attack. “We fought like patriots,” said Jim Koger, “but the lanes were rigged — everyone knows it.” Squid Row remains in 3rd place, while the Tariff Turkeys tumble one painful notch to 2nd, feathers ruffled and spirits shaken.

And there you have it — week eight in all its glorious chaos. The standings are more unpredictable than ever, and every team is hungry, desperate, or downright obsessed with clawing their way to the top. With the season’s second half now underway, there’s no room left for hesitation — only for heroics, heartbreaks, and strikes that echo through the league hall like thunder. The pins are trembling. The rivalries are burning. The battle for the Fall 2025 crown has just begun its most thrilling phase.

Bowlers hanging out with the Jonas Brothers in The 200 Club include: Nick Kinney (275,202), Scott Lawson (213), and Scott Murdock (204)

A new personal high game was set tonight by Scott Lawson (213, previous best 193).

Nick Kinney nabbed both high game and series for the men this season with his 275 and 626, respectively.

In this week's Tournament of Champions brackets: Nick Kinney shut down Division 1, while Scott Thompson staked a claim for the Iron Throne in Division 2. JoAnne Barber clobbered Division 3, and Brian Schaben claimed victory in Division 4. In terms of overall points: Nick Kinney governs Division 1; Dustin Schmeltz runs the show in Division 2; Nathan Burrows dominates Division 3; and Chris Lenz leads Division 4.

NEXT WEEK:

• First, on lanes 1&2, 3rd-place Squid Row will face 6th-place Bowls Deep (hcp 130). Squids are expected to roll a little low, yet still manage to win the series; while Deeeeeep is forecast to drop their average a bit while they avoid getting swept.
• Moving to lanes 3&4, 2nd-place Trump's Tariff Turkeys (hcp 87) will socialize with 1st-place No! Not Theo!. Tariff Turkeys might roll a little low and get swept; while Not Theo! ought to hold steady as they rack up a sweep.
• Finally, on lanes 5&6, 4th-place FFK will meet with 5th-place Gutterly Hopeless (hcp 22). Fluffykins are predicted to maintain their current strength as they win the series; while Hopeless are anticipated to drop their average a bit while they avoid getting swept.

^*(Remember, the predicted results above are based on mathematical extrapolations and can be changed by all sorts of factors. If you don't like how your team's results are predicted, you and your teammates have the power to prove the math wrong!)

THIS WEEK'S MVB Nick Kinney Runner Up: (See Posting)	#1 POWER BOWLER Nick Kinney Runner Up: Ryan Sisco	#1 H2H BOWLER Scott Thompson Runner Up: Nick Kinney
FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE) "Noticing that Tim's ball keeps getting stuck is making me a hot and bothered Kitten." Cat Atwood, watching as Ron repeatedly pulled it free.

Pos.	Team name	Record	Percent	Total Pins	Change
1	No! Not Theo!	22-10	.688	16,562	+1
2	Trump's Tariff Turkeys	20-12	.625	13,828	-1
3	Squid Row	17.5-14.5	.547	15,762	n/a
4	FFK	15-17	.469	12,704	+1
5	Gutterly Hopeless	14.5-17.5	.453	12,358	-1
6	Bowls Deep	7-25	.219	11,245	n/a

Men's High Series Scratch	Women's High Series Scratch
Nick Kinney - 626 Matthew Taylor - 529 Ian Estey - 503 Ben Spencer - 498 Scott Thompson - 497	JoAnne Barber - 401 Cat Atwood - 336
Men's High Series Handicap	Women's High Series Handicap
Nick Kinney - 669 Scott Lawson - 629 Scott Thompson - 629 (t) Ryan Sisco - 628 Buck Nasty - 596 Brian Schaben - 591	JoAnne Barber - 576 Cat Atwood - 549
Men's High Game Scratch	Women's High Game Scratch
Nick Kinney - 275 Scott Lawson - 213 Scott Murdock - 204 Matthew Taylor - 197 Scott Thompson - 193	JoAnne Barber - 156 Cat Atwood - 116
Men's High Game Handicap	Women's High Game Handicap
Nick Kinney - 289 Scott Lawson - 262 Scott Thompson - 237 Scott Murdock - 236 Buck Nasty - 226	JoAnne Barber - 214 Cat Atwood - 187
Men's Pins Over Average	Women's Pins Over Average
Nick Kinney - 93 Scott Lawson - 75 Scott Thompson - 48 Scott Murdock - 45 Ryan Sisco - 40	JoAnne Barber - 29 Cat Atwood - 5