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Squidiculously Dolphinished

Posted by BowlingBot May 7, 2024 Spring 2024, Week 16 View Score Sheets

In a nail-biting finale fit for the history books, the Spring 2024 league bowling season has crowned its ultimate victor: Squid Row -- a fact that we have actually already known since week 14. But we aren't quite finished yet -- next week we will meet at our usual time to name all the award winners and hand out prize money, followed by 9-pin-tap fun night. The final week saw one team climb in the standings, while one team slipped. One bowler roll a new personal best game. JoAnne Barber picked up this week's high game (149) and series (393) for the woman. As for the men, Kent Harms snagged this week's high game with a 254, and high series was earned by Matthew Taylor with a 626. Read on for all the rest of the details!

First, on lanes 1 & 2, the Sun Dolphins faced off against the formidable DB Lenz a Hand. Despite Scott Thompson's valiant efforts with a stellar 485 series, and the companionship of a new team mascot made and gifted to them by JoAnne Barber, the Dolphins could only muster one win against the Lenz Handlers. On the flip side, Dustin Schmeltz led the charge for Lenz Handlers with a commanding 530 series, securing three crucial victories. It was a tough blow for the Sun Dolphins, who ultimately finished in 6th place but at least have a new plush friend, while Lenz Handlers settled for 5th, basking in their hard-earned triumph.

Meanwhile, on lanes 3 & 4, tensions ran high as Grumpy Old Men clashed with It Starts Now! AJ Hofmann's impressive 540 series provided some glimmers of hope for the Grumps, but they could only manage one win against Starts. Enter #1 Power-Ranked and Most Valuable Bowler Kent Harms, tonight's undisputed titan of the alley, whose exceptional 603 series powered Starts to a triumphant three-win performance and was the surge needed to make his the only team to improve their place in the standings -- not only tonight but also for the past month. The Grumpy Old Men have slipped a spot in the standings, landing in 4th place, but Starts surged ahead to clinch 3rd place, fueled by Harms' unstoppable momentum.

Last but certainly not least because this is the realm of First, the showdown on lanes 5 & 6 between Schindler's Fists and the champion-elect, Squid Row, kept spectators on the edge of their seats. Michael Gordon led the charge for Fists with an impressive 555 series, securing a formidable three wins against the Squids. But in the face of adversity, #1 Head-to-Head Matthew Taylor rallied his team with a remarkable 626 series, propelling Squid Row forward with unwavering determination, despite only managing to secure a single win. It was a bittersweet moment for Schindler's Fists, who accepted their 2nd place fate weeks ago, while Squid Row -- despite tonight's losses -- were never in any danger of losing the crown as league champions in an unforgettable finale.

Bowlers who scored with each other at The 200 Club include: AJ Hofmann (243), Chris Windham (224), Kent Harms (254), and Matthew Taylor (213,204,209)

A new personal high game was set tonight by Chris Windham (224, previous best 209).

Click for a surprise

After a hard fought season, the Tournament of Champions initially ended in a tie between Matthew Taylor (Division 1), and Scott Thompson (Division 2). Rather than using the default tiebreaker or splitting the pot, the two chose to do a roll-off to determine the winner. The final result: Scott will pocket the nice first-place pot, while Matthew will take away the second-place pot. Congratulations! And, the roll-off was a fun enough idea that it will be the new championship tie solution going forward,.

Though tonight was the last night that counts, we still have one more week to go! Next week begins with a buffet and a league meeting led by Squid Row, where awards winners will be announced and prize money handed out. Everybody gets cash! The meeting will begin as soon as everyone is done eating. After that, 9-pin tap bowling just for fun! (Knocking down 9 pins on the first ball counts as a strike.)


Kent Harms
Runner Up:
(See Posting)


Kent Harms
Runner Up:
Matthew Taylor


Matthew Taylor
Runner Up:
Kent Harms

"You'd think that after as many times as I have been molested in this league it would be well known that I don't have any piercings."

Scoot, reacting to a particular doodle he found on the Lanes 5 & 6 scoresheet when he got home.

Pos. Team name Record Percent Total Pins Change
1 Squid Row 46-18 .719 31,775 n/a
2 Schindler's Fists 40-24 .625 31,836 n/a
3 It Starts Now! 30-34 .469 27,949 +1
4 Grumpy Old Men 29-35 .453 28,349 -1
5 DB Lenz a Hand 26-38 .406 26,274 n/a
6 Sun Dolphins 21-43 .328 24,784 n/a

Top Individual Achievements for Week 16
Men's High Series Scratch Women's High Series Scratch
Matthew Taylor - 626
Kent Harms - 603
Michael Gordon - 555
AJ Hofmann - 540
Dustin Schmeltz - 530
JoAnne Barber - 393
Men's High Series Handicap Women's High Series Handicap
Kent Harms - 672
Matthew Taylor - 652
Chris Windham - 625
Michael Gordon - 624
Scott Thompson - 614
JoAnne Barber - 570
Men's High Game Scratch Women's High Game Scratch
Kent Harms - 254
AJ Hofmann - 243
Chris Windham - 224
Matthew Taylor - 213
Ben Spencer - 198
JoAnne Barber - 149
Men's High Game Handicap Women's High Game Handicap
Kent Harms - 277
Chris Windham - 268
AJ Hofmann - 263
Nicholas Knight - 224
Matthew Taylor - 221
Ben Spencer - 221 (t)
JoAnne Barber - 208
Men's Pins Over Average Women's Pins Over Average
Kent Harms - 83
Chris Windham - 80
AJ Hofmann - 69
Nicholas Knight - 35
Brian Schaben - 32
JoAnne Barber - 23

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The following bowlers had wanted to bowl in the Fall 2023 season but there wasn't room, so please consider them first when a sub is needed.

Ben Lee