The Spring 2026 season is now underway, with six teams entering the 16-week competition for the coveted, nonexistent championship trophy. JoAnne Barber picked up this week's high game (131) and series (381) for the women. As for the men, Seth Gunderson snagged this week's high game with a 214, and high series was earned by Matthew Taylor with a 566. Read on for all the rest of the details!

First up, on lanes 1 & 2: In a matchup that could almost be considered unfair, the unlikely heroes of 3 Pins and a Gutter shared a few beers with the minions of Satan making up Squid Row. Regardless of the star power of JoAnne Barber with her 381 series, with kudos to Most Valuable Bowler No one, Gutterly Pinned got swept by Squids. On the other half of the score sheet, #1 Power-Ranked Matthew Taylor and his 566 series reigned supreme within Squids as they swept the competition. 3 Pins and a Gutter realizes their existence in 6th place, while Squids begin in 1st.

On lanes 3 & 4: In a juxtaposition of two close team averages, Hot-n-Ready® kept stealing sips of beer from New Team, Who Dis?. Demonstrating the prowess of Ian Estey with his 552 series, The Ready® collected 3 wins against New Team. Across the ball return, #1 Head-to-Head Dustin Schmeltz and his 550 series dominated New Team despite his team notching only a single win. Hot-n-Ready® begins the season in 3rd place, while New Team springs to life in 4th.

Finally, down on lanes 5 & 6: Walk Offs kept grabbing the balls of Thots & Spares. In spite of top-billing by Chris Hagan with his 369 series, Walkers got swept by Thots. So what went on with the other team? Well, AJ Hofmann with his 532 series called the shots for Thots as they swept the competition. Walk Offs enters the world in 5th place, while Thots get going with 2nd.

Bowlers who lied to their significant other claiming bowling was running long then went out for after-bowling drinks at The 200 Club include: Ian Estey (205), Matthew Taylor (205,204), and Seth Gunderson (214)

NEXT WEEK:

• First, on lanes 1&2, 5th-place Walk Offs (estimated hcp 124) will match wits with 4th-place New Team, Who Dis?. Walkers are expected to roll a little low and lose the series but avoid getting swept; while New Team is forecast to drop their average a bit even as they enjoy their victories.
• Moving to lanes 3&4, 6th-place 3 Pins and a Gutter (estimated hcp 112) will face 2nd-place Thots & Spares. Gutterly Pinned might maintain their current strength as they get swept; while Thots ought to drop their average a bit even as they rack up a sweep.
• Finally, on lanes 5&6, 1st-place Squid Row will spend some quality time with 3rd-place Hot-n-Ready® (estimated hcp 7). Squids are predicted to have their averages plummet, but split the series with The Ready®; while The Ready® is anticipated to see their team average take a dive while they keep the series tied.

^*(Remember, the predicted results above are based on mathematical extrapolations and can be changed by all sorts of factors. If you don't like how your team's results are predicted, you and your teammates have the power to prove the math wrong!)

THIS WEEK'S MVB No one Runner Up: (See Posting)	#1 POWER BOWLER Matthew Taylor Runner Up: Jon Little	#1 H2H BOWLER Dustin Schmeltz Runner Up: AJ Hofmann
FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE) "Oh, that's JoAnne's dog. I think it's a Pomeranian. I can't leave him home alone or he eats the furniture." Jeremy Varnell, describing AJ Hofmann to one of the rookies.