The Spring 2025 season rolls to a dramatic finale, with FILPB officially locking down the championship! But don't put your balls on ice just yet — the alley action isn’t quite over. We’ll reconvene next week for a final gathering: prizes, awards, and the ever-chaotic 9-pin tap night await. And unlike last season, EVERYBODY winds money this time -- some of you even win a lot. As the dust settles, one team soared, another spiraled, and more than a few dreams went up in pins. JoAnne Barber threw down the week’s high game (145) and series (422) for the women, while Ben Spencer led the men with a fiery 212 game, and Nick Kinney closed the season with a searing 568 series. But enough prelude — here’s how the last competitive week shook out:

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First up, on lanes 1 & 2: FFK squared off with Bowls Deep in a matchup that started tight — and ended with a feline-fueled frenzy. With #1 Power-Ranked and Most Valuable Bowler Scott Lawson purring through a commanding 501 series, the Kittens pounced their way to a full sweep, yowling with joy as they clawed into a 5th-place finish. “This team isn’t just pretty paws,” Cat said gleefully. Meanwhile, Bowls Deep found themselves sinking with every frame. Ian Estey rolled a 498 in a valiant solo effort, but it was like bailing water with a thimble. “Chris H and Carl were solid, but I think the lanes just swallowed us whole,” Ian muttered. “Next season, we bring snorkels.” DEEEEEEP ends the season submerged in 6th.

On lanes 3 & 4: It was the coronation of FILPB as they stormed the lanes against . With #1 Head-to-Head Nick Kinney exploding for a 568 series, FILPB went full throttle, sweeping the board and locking in 1st place with a champagne-worthy finish. “We didn’t come here to spare feelings,” said Buck with a grin. “We came to strike gold.” On the other side of the scoreboard, heartbreak echoed like a gutterball as Team Name Loading — once in reach of the title — completely crashed. Despite Scott Murdock's respectable 476 series, the team got steamrolled, plummeting to a 3rd-place finish. “We were buffering all season for this moment,” sighed Tim. “Then the whole team blue-screened.” AJ added, “If you’re looking for us next week, we’ll be in the recycle bin.”

Finally, down on lanes 5 & 6: Squid Row emerged from the depths to face the underdog darlings of Gutterly Hopeless. Ben Spencer brought the calamari thunder with a 555 series, helping Squid net 3 wins and vault themselves into 2nd place with tentacles waving triumphantly. “We were born to krill it,” quipped Matt. “Second place never looked so slick.” Across the lane, Gutterly Hopeless fought tooth and nail, with JoAnne Barber turning in an inspired 422 series. But the rest of the team struggled to stay afloat — especially Jeremy Varnell, whose first game barely scraped past half his average. “It was like bowling during a colonoscopy,” Jeremy said, shaking his head. “I think my balls were asleep.” Gutterly Hopeless ends in 4th place, but spirits remain weirdly high. “We may be hopeless,” shrugged Chris L, “but at least we’re consistent.”

Though tonight was the last night that counts, we still have one more week to go! Next week begins with a buffet and a league meeting led by FILPB, where awards winners will be announced and prize money handed out. Everybody gets cash! The meeting will begin as soon as everyone is done eating. After that, 9-pin tap bowling just for fun! (Knocking down 9 pins on the first ball counts as a strike.)

Bowlers who lied to their significant other claiming bowling was running long then went out for after-bowling drinks at The 200 Club include: Ben Spencer (212) and Nick Kinney (209)

After a hard fought season, the Tournament of Champions was won tonight by Scott Lawson (Division 2), with Buck Nasty (Division 3) landing in second place. Scott will pocket the nice first-place pot, while Buck will take away the second-place pot. Congratulations!

THIS WEEK'S MVB Scott Lawson Runner Up: (See Posting)	#1 POWER BOWLER Scott Lawson Runner Up: Ben Spencer	#1 H2H BOWLER Nick Kinney Runner Up: Ben Spencer
FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE) "You could always have Scott get the rest of those for you." Jim Koger, to Tim Deddens, simultaneously mocking Tim for consistently knocking down only 1 pin and Scott M for consistently leaving one

Pos.	Team name	Record	Percent	Total Pins	Change
1	FILPB	45.5-18.5	.711	31,336	n/a
2	Squid Row	39-25	.609	31,746	+1
3	(Team Name Loading)	38.5-25.5	.602	28,303	-1
4	Gutterly Hopeless	25.5-38.5	.398	23,498	n/a
5	FFK	24-40	.375	26,705	n/a
6	Bowls Deep	19.5-44.5	.305	24,186	n/a

insert into team_standings (teamID, seasonID, week, wins, losses, percent, movement, `rank`) values (439,52, 16, 19.5, 44.5, .305, 0, 6)

Men's High Series Scratch	Women's High Series Scratch
Nick Kinney - 568 Ben Spencer - 555 Matthew Taylor - 550 Seth Gunderson - 503 Scott Lawson - 501	JoAnne Barber - 422 Cat Atwood - 350
Men's High Series Handicap	Women's High Series Handicap
Scott Lawson - 640 Ben Spencer - 634 Nick Kinney - 630 Jacob Holst - 614 Matthew Taylor - 605	JoAnne Barber - 594 Cat Atwood - 575
Men's High Game Scratch	Women's High Game Scratch
Ben Spencer - 212 Nick Kinney - 209 Matthew Taylor - 198 Scott Murdock - 188 Seth Gunderson - 182	JoAnne Barber - 145 Cat Atwood - 135
Men's High Game Handicap	Women's High Game Handicap
Ben Spencer - 238 Kurt Fredrickson - 230 Nick Kinney - 229 Scott Lawson - 227 Scott Murdock - 220	Cat Atwood - 210 JoAnne Barber - 202
Men's Pins Over Average	Women's Pins Over Average
Kurt Fredrickson - 49 Ben Spencer - 45 Scott Lawson - 39 Jacob Holst - 37 Nick Kinney - 35	Cat Atwood - 29 JoAnne Barber - 17